Being Well Means Being Yourself

I write this blog post in response to some people's questions regarding my lifestyle and how I describe it. Often people ask me if I am vegan or how I define my diet. First of all, I don't like labels and I don't like that we feel the need to put people into categories. However, I do know that this is a normal function of the human brain. We categorize things in order to more readily evaluate and process the world. This ability to categorize aided in our survival as man developed over time. Categorizing helps us learn from our mistakes. From an evolutionary perspective, "thin-slicing," or taking a small piece of information to make a quick judgement, helps us gain immediate responses, in order to assess whether or not there is danger in front of us. It helps us to determine appropriate behavior in different circumstances. However, sometimes we take categorizing too far. When you try to put a label on a person or put a person into a category, it might help you better understand that person, but it will also limit your openness to them. Categorizing makes it easier to write someone off, easier to be less tolerant, easier to be sexist or racist. It is important that you always remain open to people and that you always allow people to surprise you. This is why I have always been averse to labeling others and labeling myself.

When people ask me what I eat and I tell them, I almost always get surprised looks. Not because what I eat is so radical, but because to different groups who may not grasp the middle, gray areas of eating, my diet does not fit into a category. To the strict vegans, I am shameful. To the dedicated carnivores, I am a silly rabbit. To general doctors, I am a radical hippie who has crazy ideas about healing the body. To friends who watch my dietary journey, I am all over the place. Well here's what I say to everyone: being well means being yourself, and it usually means breaking through the mold of categories. Choose your own diet-- of food, of thoughts, of everything-- and you will be walking with greater integrity and greater happiness. We are fortunate enough to have great freedoms in this country and two wonderful ones are choosing the food you eat and the thoughts you consume. Just because I was once a meat-eater, that I've been vegan, that I've been pescetarian, that I've been a meat-eater again and that I've been vegan again, doesn't mean that my dietary choices are right or wrong. Everyone has his or her journey and as long as you are not harming yourself or anyone else, and you are on the path to betterment, then keep on doing what you are doing, regardless of what other people think. If you know that you are making a difference in the world, whether it be from eating less meat or taking care of a child, then you are doing fantastically, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Just because you are not a full-fledged vegan or Mother Teresa, does not mean you are not contributing to the betterment of the civilization. To a cancer patient in a hospital, the person who makes funny movies for him is just as important as the surgeon. If you want to eat carrots all day and your office mates make jokes that you eat like a rabbit, well then so what. Let them call you Roger, and call it a day. If you care too much about what other people think, then you are focusing your thoughts on the wrong stuff. And then it doesn't even matter what you put in your mouth, because your thoughts are the most important food you eat all day, everyday. If you want to be a great human being, have great thoughts. Period. Because thoughts produce after their own kind. Great thoughts lead to great action. Bad thoughts lead to bad action... or even inaction.

So what am I? A vegan? A flexetarian? A carnivore? An omnivore? A woman? A 28-year-old? A daughter? An artist? A chef? A blonde? A miscreant? A typical youth of Generation Y? I am me. That's all. I eat a diet based largely on plants. That diet has changed and evolved throughout time. It has been emotional, physical, spiritual, exhausting, uplifting, painful, beautiful, energizing and very human. One day I want to be a perfect vegan forever and other days I just want some cheese pizza. And other days I want some fish. And other days I want a handcrafted cappuccino in Italy with steamed milk. And other days I just want green juice all day long. And other days I want some bbq. I don't usually eat processed foods and I try to eat as cleanly as possible. Most days I love to eat smoothies and salads. The more green I get in a day, the happier I am. But my other meals change from time to time. I love food and good food is one of my favorite things life has to offer. My career is centered around food. But it is also centered around wellness and being gentle with yourself. Anyone who looks at my menus can see that my favorite type of thing to create is healthy comfort food. Food unites us and inspires us and makes us feel good. Occasionally my sweet tooth will kick in without warning and when that happens there is sometimes no stopping it. I get it. I understand why so many people in this country are obese. It is hard to say no sometimes. But I know to gently dilute cravings, and that is by not being so hard on myself. And that is what I hope to teach others to do for themselves, as well. I can mitigate my sweet tooth with sugar-free organic coconut 'ice cream.' I can facilitate a diet worth sticking to, by adding healthy snacks in there or not being perfect all the time. I do what I can. There are baby steps to keeping oneself in line with what one wants to achieve. So that coconut ice cream keeps me in line with my own guidelines. But my own wellness technique is dictated by me-- not the choreography of anyone else's life. It is important to nurture yourself, trust your own journey and to be true to you. It is akin to putting the oxygen mask on yourself before anyone else. Be yourself and you will be well. Think those happy thoughts, without too much criticism from the outside. Be mindful of other's opinions but know that you don't have to take harshness to heart. Be kind to yourself and do not impose too much judgement. There are enough people who do that in this world enough. Care less what others think and care more about yourself.

A great article on a similar theme was written by Sarma Melngailis, chef and owner of Pure Food & Wine in NYC and can be found here. A self-proclaimed "mostly raw vegan," a friend took a picture of her eating meat at Peter Lugar's in New York, and sent it to the press. People didn't understand her and got upset by this because in the vegan world, just like any community that is inspired by passionate beliefs, people can get emotional. But Sarma never said that she was a vegan. She owns a raw restaurant but she isn't always raw. Why do people always have to make everything black and white? Ah yes, because categorizing is a survival tactic, and as intelligent as we are, we are still animals. Human beings will forever be evolving, and in this evolution, perhaps we can evolve to a place of being more tolerant of one another and less likely to restrict someone's light with confining labels. Remember that being well, means being yourself. And that you never have to fit inside a box. Because life is no fun inside a box.